Confrontations
by Foxyinthecity
Summary: Contains some spoilers specifically from Seasons 4 and 5. There are times when indecisions and unspoken words need to be address. Sheyla.
1. Chapter 1

Firstly, I do not own any rights to Stargate Atlantis.

Spoilers: Some minor from Season 4 and possible Season 5…very remote.

This story came to me yesterday as I look forward to the new Season of Atlantis with RL distractions finally calming down. I dedicated this story to my girl, Mo! Thanks for always encouraging me!! I'm grateful you are in my life. I'm no longer in a box…I'm ready to soar!! And your encouragements have meant the world to me truly!!

**Confrontations**

John Sheppard picked his self off the floor of the training room as the pain in his gut subsided. For the past half an hour, he and his teammate, Ronon had been sparring. Their bantos sticks entwined in a game of power, swiftness, and evade. It has long become their nightly sport or ritual or in Ronon's case, his nightly fun.

John groaning, his pain evidence on his face… looked at Ronon who as a smirk on his face. With Ronon seeming to be enjoying his pain, John frowned. Ronon got in a lucky shot…at least that what John wanted to think as he looked at the tall dreadlock hair Satedan with a penetrating gaze.

"You are not focusing Sheppard."

"Ah, yeah…sure."

"You're not focusing. Your body is present in this room, but your mind is somewhere else."

"Since when have you become Dr. Phil?"

John rolled his eyes at his teammate who was his nemesis at the moment as he stood to his feet. Ronon watched his teammate with amusement and a little pity. He knew John's anger and frustration didn't have anything to do with their little sparring session. John's anger and frustration stemmed from the family moment he witnessed earlier between Teyla, Kannan and their son, a son that bears John's name and the amount time Kannan has been spending with Teyla and her son lately.

Kannan who had been on the Atlantis since he helped John and the others to escape from Michael's ship after Michael had kidnapped Teyla. Although, Kannan had helped them to escaped, Ronon still didn't trust the guy and he knew John shared his feelings as well. The only reason Kannan was still on Atlantis was because of Teyla and his close proximity to Teyla and the baby was annoying and worring John and him as well.

"Why don't you go talk to her?"

"And say what!"

"How you feel for starter!"

"What are you getting at?"

"You know Sheppard… I have watched you and Teyla for the past four years! You can't tell me that you don't care for her. Every one that knows the both of you except for possibly McKay can see it if both of you can't!"

"You want me to say how I feel when I don't know myself!"

"You are in love with her. Yet, you keep silent. It is your silence that allowed whatever happened between Teyla and Kannan to happen in the first place. She doesn't care for him like she cares for you, but you are either too blind or stubborn to see it."

"You saw them just like I did."

"She is in a complicate position. You know Teyla as well as I do if not more! Do you really think she will turn her back on him now?"

"I don't trust him. I want the guy gone," John mumbled.

"But there is a small part of me that feels sorry for him. For what Michael did to him. "

To John, Kannan's present was a constant reminder to him that Teyla must have or had deep feelings for Kannan. She had his child for goodness sake. He is finding that he is having a hard time dealing with Kannan's present on Atlantis. He is grappling with emotions foreign to him…his frustration increasing with each passing day.

Before it was different, when Kannan and the other Athosians were missing, he didn't have a face to go with the name. Kannan was a stranger. Someone he could forget existed even with the increasing evidence of Teyla's pregnancy. He felt his bond with Teyla had strengthen during those months she was pregnant once he had gotten over his initial shock and hurt that she kept her pregnancy a secret from him allowing him to put her life in danger by going on missions in her condition. Their relationship had overcome that earlier turmoil. He had started to think of Teyla's unborn child as theirs.

Ronon looked at his best friend in understanding. Who was now sitting on the bench by the window, head lower and towel in hand. He really did feel for his friend, but deciding what his friend needed was the blunt honest truth. And he couldn't take seeing his two closest friends unhappy which both were trying to mask.

"You need to decide what you can live with and what you can't. Right now, what have your choices gotten you?"

With that he turned and walked out of the training room, leaving John watching his departing back with a frown edge on his face and turmoil fill eyes.

TBC

**_Please leave a review_**.


	2. Chapter 2

I want to thank you guys who took the time to review. They really do inspire.

**Chapter 2**

The following day on the outside balcony next to the commissary…John, Rodney and Ronon were sitting at a table eating their breakfast. When Rodney questioned the whereabouts of Teyla, as he was discussing his latest update of the city's program. Upon hearing Teyla's name, John looked up from his plate when he made eye contact with Ronon. Ronon looked at him intently for several seconds then shakes his head before taking another bite of his food.

John's mouth purses… he then looked down at the food on his plate and grabbed a piece of his toast and taking a bite, but not really tasting any of it. With Ronon looking at John in that manner, John had found it annoying and not helping his disposition in the least. It was bad enough his thoughts were still occupied with their previous night conversation. Ronon's words had been a constant echo in his mind ever since. _What have your choices gotten you?_

It was all that occupied his thoughts since last night so much so that when he had close his eyes hoping for some peace from his mixed up emotions…sleep was elusive. Shocked about what Ronon had said regarding Teyla's feelings for him. He had wondered if it could really be true. Hope and happiness of the possibility of her feelings for him spring forth, but then the doubts returned about his place in her heart. Teyla's relationship with Kannan and the child they created playing a most important part in his frustration.

He had long accepted Torren. He loves that little guy. And even a part of him wishes Torren was his. But Teyla's relationship with Kannan was a whole different matter altogether. Knowing Teyla as he does, he knows she must of had or maybe still do have very strong feelings for Kannan. How can he compete with that?

As the sun had streamed it way into his room this morning, he was still no closer in deciding what he should do. There were too many complicated issues involved. Too many unknown! Rodney who didn't seem to pick upon the undercurrents at play between his two teammates sitting at the table with him continued to talk while his other two teammates would occasionally engaged in a duel of stares.

The knowing looks from Ronon only served to annoy John further. John was starting to suspect that Ronon was deliberately doing that to annoy him. When John was about to leave the table, he could had sworn he saw a smirk on Ronon's face. Some friend, he thought as he made his way to his office to do some paper work! The remaining of the John's morning went in a haze until his scheduled afternoon meeting with Mr. Woolsey.

Later…

Sitting in a meeting in Mr. Woolsey's office with Mr. Woosley were John, Teyla and Dr. Keller.

"Ms. Emmagen, it is IOA decision. We can not allow the Athosians to remain on Atlantis. Not when the location of Atlantis and the safety of the expedition are in jeopardy," Woolsey said tersely.

"We don't know whether these experiments…this, this Michael performed on your people will have any lasting effect."

"Mr. Woolsey, I understand your concern as well that of the IOA. But, there is no way any of my people would or willing put the location of Atlantis in jeopardy! It is my people's wish to get on with their lives. They do not feel it is safe to return back to our home planet. And Dr. Keller has been trying to reverse some of the effects of Michael's experiments on some of my people."

"Ms. Emmagen, I'm sorry, the decision has been made."

"Mr. Woolsey… we have made some progress in our research. I'm very optimistic that we can find a cure for some of Teyla's people. We just need a little more time," offered Dr. Jennifer Keller.

"I'm afraid, it is time we don't have Dr. Keller," Mr. Woolsey replied firmly.

"Mr. Woolsey…I don't…," responded Teyla, with a frown forming on her face.

"Mr. Woolsey, what if we can for now… I'm sure Rodney can find an uninhabited planet where Teyla's people can be place for the time being. We can monitor them while Dr. Keller tries to work on a cure for them," provided John who had been looking at Teyla.

Teyla quickly looked at John… was that a sigh he wondered? He wasn't sure. All he knew that moments earlier Teyla looked as if she was about to…well he wasn't sure what she was about to say or do. But he knew from past experiences that a pissed off Teyla was a woman to be reckoned with.

And believing it was the only viable decision available to them at the moment that why he had expressed his understanding of the IOA's decision to Mr. Woolsey when Mr. Woolsey first informed him of the their decision a few minutes earlier before the arrival of Teyla and Dr. Keller to the meeting. With him fully knowing the kind of affect it could possible have on Teyla and her people, but he truly believed that Teyla would see and understand and accepted the wisdom of the IOA's decision because it was the right thing to do. He had been having the same exact thoughts himself.

"Well, Colonel…"

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Again, I want to thanks guys for your reviews!!

Chapter 3

"Teyla wait!"

Walking through corridors of Atlantic, Teyla stopped upon hearing John's voice…turning around to see John approaching her quickly. As John walked up to her, he can see that she is still visibly upset from their meeting with Mr. Woolsey.

"Are you ok?"

"I'm fine. I'm just on my way to tell my people of Mr. Woolsey and the IOA's decision."

"Teyla, you must see that this is the only decision we have?"

Teyla looked at John, sighing. Sadness clouded her eyes for a moment before she replied, "John, I have lost so many of my people because of Michael and his experiments." Pausing as she recalled the countless faces she will never see again. The men, women and children…the many families lost.

"A few of my people, who are still among us, are no longer themselves. They are not people that I once knew," she continued. John paused, his face soften. In his mind, this was the right time to reaffirm to Teyla that they were doing the only option available to them.

"You, yourself have told me about the influence that Michael seem have over his followers. That it appeared he had some kind of mental link to them and his claims of using Kannan to reach you." Teyla nodded her head slightly as to confirm they had such a discussion.

"We just can't take the risk that our location maybe compromise. We don't know where Michael is and he does have control of one of our puddle jumpers now," John added while lowering his voice, so their conversation couldn't be heard by any passersby.

"John, I'm not naïve to think that the possibility does not exist. That Michael may still have some kind of control over some of my people. But they are still my people. I'm still their leader. What am I suppose to do? It is my duty to protect them. I failed my people once already! I can not fail them again. But, somehow, once again my people will be made to feel that their presence on Atlantis is not welcome due to fear and suspicion."

John frowned at Teyla's words. Recalling the time before when Teyla's people had decided to leave what they thought was the City of the Ancestors when suspicion and doubts about some of their involvement with the Wraith had surfaced. Teyla, herself was under that suspicion and even accused by his own head of security, Bates of working with and for the Wraith. He felt compelled to deny it, but he couldn't because in a way, her words were true.

"John, my people were simple farmers…that somehow, became pawns in Michael's evil sick plans. Plans that somehow involve my son! Michael wants my son, so he can dominate everyone in the galaxy in his twisted mind. Yes, I know Michael is still out. And that he is out there waiting on the first opportunity to take my son from me for his evil plans."

"Then, I don't get why are you allowing Kannan to be in such close proximity to TJ?" The words left John's mouth before he could take them back. One of Teyla's eyebrows rose.

"Because Kannan is my son's father! I can not restrict Kannan access to his son. I lost my father as a child. I will not willing do that to my son or to his father even though, his father is not the man I once knew. If you can not understand that, then you don't know me at all!"

"Teyla, I get that! And I know Kannan helped us to get off Michael's ship, but I fear his link to Michael…is…is still there." "I just feel it isn't safe for you or TJ to…"

"John, I love my son very much. More than I though it was possible to love anything or another human being! My son's safety is of the utmost priority to me! And no matter, how much I wish certain things were different... "

"Teyla, I'm not questioning your love for your son. I…I know how much you love your son. But…"

"John!! I can't… I can't discuss this with you now." Although, Teyla was very moved by John's concern for the safety of her son and even though her abrupt words belied her true feelings - seeing John's concern only tore at her already fractured heart. "John, I'm truly grateful for your concern, but I need to go to my people. There is much to do. Can we discuss this later please?"

"Ah, alright. I. I. I'll come with you if you want. I'll try to explain the situation to your people. I'll try to make them understand that this is in everyone's best interest for the time being."

"No, John! I'm their leader…I will speak to them alone."

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Wow, I know it has been awhile, but guys, I am trying to get back to writing. I am going to try to finish these stories.

**Chapter 4**

Teyla watched what was left of her proud people gathered into the commissary. Their numbers greatly reduced due to Michael's experiments. Although, it had been several weeks since their rescue from Michael's base of operation and her own safe return to Atlantis from the Hive's ship that Michael had held her captive on. A chill ran through her as with any thoughts of Michael. As well as the searing rage for what Michael tried to do to her and her son, and most of all what he did to her people. She had her own burdens to carry regarding her time on Michael's ship, but now her concerns were for her people.

Her people; the people she could still see that were still suffering from the different experiments that were performed on them, wounds and hurts not measured by the scars on their skins. When they had first found her people, so many of them looked fragile, mal nourished and fearful or turned into one of Michael's beastly creatures. Kanaan, her son's father had been such as a creature, but with Dr. Keller's treatments he was almost back to normal, and she was internally grateful to the doctor for the care she bestowed on Kanaan and her people.

But many of her people still carried scars. They had scars that were outward on their bodies, but it was the scars that were invisible to the eyes; those scars were reflected in her people's eyes, the way they spoke of the things that were done to them on the planet that Michael had kept them as prisoners that both hurt and tormented her.

Although, Dr. Keller's treatments were working, she was quite worried about some of the adults. Her eyes found the lean frame of Halling, her friend of many years. He was still the shell of the man he used to be, but she knew he will be fine eventually. He wasn't one of the adults she was most concerned about. At least, most of the children seem to be adjusting and she was hopeful that their scars wouldn't preclude them from living productive lives as adults. Children have resiliency were adults do not.

Teyla motioned to Halling that she was ready to begin the meeting. She was fighting back the bitterness that was threatening to engulf her whenever she thought of her people's sufferings, sighing in frustration that once again - her people will feel that the people living in the city of the Ancestors don't welcome their presence in the city.

After the emotional meeting with Teyla, Teyla's people began their preparations to leave Atlantis.

Meanwhile in another location on Atlantis, in Rodney's office, Rodney was sitting at his computer – checking the Ancients' database on planets that may be suitable for Teyla's people.

In walked John, "Rodney, any luck in finding a suitable planet for Teyla's people?'

"Aw…it all depends on what your definition of suitable is."

"We have planets all over the galaxy that have either been decimated by the Replicators, decimated by the new and improved Hoffan's drug that Michael had somehow found a way to infect them with..., ah, and then there always the threat of the Wraith showing up at any moment."

"Rodney, how difficult can it be for, you? As long as there is a Stargate on the planet…"

"Why can't Teyla's people returned to their New Atho?"

"Maybe the fact that Michael and his men or hybrids or whatever they are called – was already able to take Teyla's people before... and Michael is still out there wanting Teyla's son."

"Oh. But we could…"

"Rodney, you know Teyla. You know Teyla will go to the planet often to visit her people. And that Torren will be going with her…I would just prefer that it would be on a planet that Michael doesn't have any knowledge about. Don't you?"

Rodney's brows rose at the realization that Teyla's son was very much still in danger from Michael. John seeing Rodney's understanding of the situation turned to leave.

"I'm not a miracle worker you know."

John who was walking through the opened doors - paused for a moment. Without looking back at Rodney, "I have faith in you Rodney," with that he proceeded through the door as Rodney turned his attention back to his computer's screen and keyboard.

A couple days after, a refugee's encampment was established for the Athosians on a small obscure planet on the edge of the Pegasus Galaxy. This planet had a Stargate.

A couple of weeks later...with her people on the new planet – Teyla tried to visit them has often as she could. She was happy that the tests with Dr. Beckett's retro virus were seemingly working – so she was hopeful for her people's recovery, but guarded. But those visits and the responsibilities of being a new mom were taking their toll on her. Teyla was trying not to harbor any resentment about the IOA's decision regarding her people. And another pressing concern for Teyla was her position on John's team.

She hadn't put in her papers to return to active duty and to rejoin John's team yet. She was too aware of the dangers of going on away missions. Knowing there was always the possibility that she might not come back from a mission; that any mission, she could be leaving her son without a mother. These concerns weighted heavy on her mind. If something should happen to her on a mission - who would be there and able to take care of her son? What would be a son's future? Also, Teyla was grappling with Kanaan's placed in their son's life as well as her own along with her people's future.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

I have given myself a challenge to try to update a fic at least once a week even if RL is a nightmare at the moment for me. And I want to thank those who have taken the time to read this story (and others) and as given me some type of feedback. They have helped my muse.

**Chapter 5**

A figure sits quietly watching the screen in front of him evaluating data samples. His features, human in nature, but the coloring of his skin and the unusual colors of his eyes, and the long narrow fingers were still evident of the creature he once was.

Michael, whose appearance, has gone through several transformations within the last several months since his initial escape from the city of the Ancients and his subsequent time on the Hive's ship with others of his kind. These transformations came about as a result of that time.

The vile treatment that Michael received from his own Wraith's brothers upon his returned to the Hive after his escaped from Atlantis had fueled his hatred against his own. His own kind had turned their backs on him, making him feel he was not worthy of being call Wraith. They used him and ridiculed him at their whims only making him hate the thing which had been his existence.

Once he was free and on his own, he began his research and work on his own DNA and the DNA of the humans and the other species of the Pegasus Galaxy, with some surprising results. But, it was his time on the Wraith Hive's ship that gave a light to his plans and to his determination to have all the strengths of being a Wraith and his desire to eradicate all the weakness he felt the Wraith as a species had, and that was their need to feed on humans. And it was that need he had try to used to bring about their destruction and death, killing humans and Wraith alike when he used a modified revision of the Hoffan's drug to make humans immune to Wraith feeding.

With his eyes still intent on the screen before him, Michael touched several buttons on the control panel of his system. The contents of the image on the screen shifted suddenly, changing. In its place were several images. These images were a video and in this video, Teyla Emmagen was bounded to a large metal table. Her hands held secured in circular metal rings, her swollen pregnant belly very visible.

Michael gazed at the screen for several moments. Turning away, seething rage claiming his body. He had been so close! _He had had Teyla and her unborn child in his possession_ _only to lose her, them._ He had given her that drug to speed up the progression of her delivery of her son when Colonel Sheppard and the others had showed up at the compound he was on his way to take Teyla, their presence at the compound interfering with his plans. He lost valuable data when he had to destroy that compound and fled with Teyla on his Hive's ship.

Then, to only have his plans thwarted by Colonel Sheppard and his team for a second time on his Hive ship when they were able to infiltrate his ship, and then they were able to rescued Teyla, subsequently ruining his plans for the moment. However, this will not deter him. He had scores to settle with Colonel Sheppard and the people of Atlantis. And he will get his vengeance on them and on those he had once considered his own. _And he will have Teyla and her child_. Her child was the key to his plans.

Michael turned around forcibly to look at the screen, touching a button on the control panel. The screen suddenly went dark. Leaning over the control panel, a smile turned the edges of his mouth. He may have lost Teyla and her child (which by his calculations she should have given birth to by now) with his last encounter with Colonel Sheppard and his people, but he did get something of their in return and it is that very thing he will used in his plans. He will make those who wronged him suffer.

----

John knew this meeting was eventually was going to occur it was just a matter of when it would occur thinking to his self as he walked in the halls heading toward Mr. Woolsey's office. So it was finally here. And he can't say he was looking forward to it. He had been holding off on this discussion. Frowning because he was close to Mr. Woolsey's office as he walked up the stairs from the gate room and already knowing Mr. Woolsey would be waiting from him, his lips pursing. Things had finally settled down on Atlantis since they had rescued Teyla from Michael's Hive ship, although Micheal was able to escape in a puddle jumper with some of his hybrids, and the fact that Michael was now in possession of ancient technology giving him an uneasy feeling. There were too much uncertainties abound with that realization. John was certain that they had not seen the last of Michael yet.

Michael would back. He could feel in the core of his being. For one, Michael still wanted Teyla's son for his sick twisted plans. And two, Michael's hatred for them was a safe bet that they would see him again. So he was certain of a few things when it came to Michael. That Michael was laying wait and planning something, but he just didn't know what that something was and two that the danger to Teyla, her child and Atlantis was still very much real. And now that Michael had the ancient gene he was even more of a serious threat to Teyla and the city.

At least some things in the city could get back to normal since the location of the city hasn't been compromise. And some things were progressing nicely. Teyla's people had seemed to settle well on the new planet. Carson was providing medical care and supervision to the Athosians once Dr. Keller was able to stabilize his health, an added benefit. And Carson was working on perfecting the retro virus. So there were definite positives John thought. He just wished everything else was that simple.

As John walked up to Mr. Woolsey's office, he saw Mr. Woolsey sitting in his chair looking in his direction. Yep, he never did like those see through glass doors, he thought, squaring his shoulders as he prepared to enter into Woolsey's glass panel office.

Several, several minutes later…

"Colonel have you replaced Ms. Emmagen on your team yet? I see that I haven't received her request to rejoin your team yet," inquired Mr. Woolsey as he shuffled through some papers in front of him on his desk.

"Ah, no sir. Since it has only been a few weeks since Teyla had her son, I thought…"

TBC

_Thanks for reading. Please review._


	6. Chapter 6

Guys, thank you for your reviews. I'm trying to address certain things that I felt the writers of the show did not do. So the next couple of chapters will do that. I have confrontation between John and Teyla coming.

**Chapter 6**

Leaving Woolsey's office after their meeting, John felt relieved the meeting was over because he really did care for the business of doing paperwork he much preferred being a solider to being a pencil pusher. And admitting to himself - he was a little apprehensive. He would have to talk to Teyla. And for the first time in a long time, he wasn't sure what Teyla would say or what she was thinking.

Things had been a little strained between them the last several weeks. They hadn't been spending a whole of lot of their time together lately as friends or teammates. Withdrawing from being around her and only seeing her when the need arises because he didn't want to be an audience to the time she had spent with Kanaan when him and the Athosians were still on Atlantis, and preferring to give her some time and space with everything she was dealing with like being a new mom and taking care of her people.

But, however, he was well aware that Teyla was saddened by IOA's decision regarding her people even though she wasn't vocal about it. In true Teyla's fashion, she had handled it with dignity and understanding. But, he was too aware of Teyla's frustration and hurt with that decision even though he believed she understood and accepted the reasons behind the IOA's decision.

He knew Teyla too well not to know that she was not happy about it. And he although, he wasn't any fan of the IOA. This was a decision, he had totally agreed with at the time in light of Michael's almost psychic ability to control the people that he had working for him. So precautions needed to be made to safeguard the city and the civilians on Atlantis.

Michael had captured and held Teyla's people for months, doing experiments on them. Heaven knows what type of experiments Michael had performed on some of Teyla's people especially ones that Michael turned into his hybrid's soliders. When they had first found and rescue all that was left of Teyla's people from Michael's compound, to his dismay, the only way to describe the state of some of her people was akin to the ravages of war. Besides being frightened, they were malnutrition, some of them had various limbs' deformities, and a few of them was already in the progression of being turning into one of those things, one of Michael's hybrid.

And after encountering a few of so called hybrid's soliders on Michael's Hive ship, he didn't too much care for the idea that Kanaan was once, one of those things either and although, Kanaan may have assisted them with escaping from Michael's ship because Teyla was able to reach through to the human part of him. And with Carson at the Athosian's settlement now, treating the Athosians with the retro virus and there seem to be some progress being made with them, _Kanaan included._ The news was that they were all back to their former human selves in appearance.

That still doesn't precluded the fact he still didn't trust the guy especially after hearing Teyla's recounting of what Michael tried to do her while he held her captive. Kanaan was there and could have helped her to escape, but chose or refused not to because of Michael. So he was still questioning the hold Michael had or has over Kanaan.

So, it was time for him to talk to Teyla, he had been trying to avoid her, dealing with certain issues, namely his feelings, but he couldn't do that any more. He knew Teyla was visiting her people with Ronon. And she was expected back the fortnight, so he would talk to her upon her return to Atlantis.

---

On the Athosians' settlement on Planet Nova, a cluster of nylon fabric shelters stood erected in the ground, tents grouped together several yards from the Stargate…in one of those tents…

"You seem tired Teyla."

Teyla looked at her friend, Halling with wary eyes for a moment. "That is because, I am. Halling, my son seems to have an aversion to sleeping at nights."

Teyla smiling half heartily at him, "So, I haven't gotten a good night sleep in weeks because of it my dear friend. I have taken to walking Torren at nights to calm him down, distracting him with the beautiful lights of the city of the ancients' ancestors, telling him stories of our proud history, telling him stories about his grandparents (her voice lowering softly upon her mentioning of her deceased parents), but it has been tiring for me with these long nights. "

Her son unwillingness to sleep more than a couple hours at a time was becoming increasingly frustrating. Like a lot of new born babies his age, many of them not sleeping at nights for long periods was nothing new. That was the natural part, but Teyla could sense it was far more than that with her son. She could sense her son's fear. It was a fear that was constant. But it was a fear that has begun to trouble her. She didn't quite understand it all yet, but she could feel her son's agitation increasing each new day.

So she had taken to walking the city at nights with him, hoping to distract him, and relishing the joy of showing him the city at night. The city of Atlantis was awe inspiring to say the least at nights. The city was quite beautiful. Lights as far as the eyes can see outlining the many structures of the city, the lines of metal columns, tall and small, brighten by the many lights. The sound of the waves of the ocean as crashing into submerged structures of the city was melodic. The way the lights reflected off ocean, glistening. Seeing the city at night, one can really see and appreciate how truly beautiful and enormous the city of the ancients was.

And her son seems fascinate by it all. How much he understood was another matter especially with someone so young. But it was a learning experience for herself as well too. She was learning many aspects of the city. She was getting to learn and discovery parts of the city that she normally would not see or had known existed on her nightly excursions with her son.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Guys, thank you for your reviews. Okay, this chapter is being told from Halling's point of view. This chapter and the last couple of chapters have been about providing information and some hints. I wanted to address that it couldn't have been easy for Teyla after becoming a mother. I don't think that was adequately addressed in the show by the writers. Listening to a recent interview of Rachel Luttrel, where she expressed that she would have loved to had explore more the affect on the team with Teyla being a mom is one in a long list of affirmations to me the writers' failure with continuality, follow through and character development for Teyla, Ronon and John. I can't tell you how disappointed and frustrated I am at the writers and tptb of SGA for their storylines emphasis in the last season of the show, their woeful neglect of writing for characters like Teyla and Ronon, their uncreative writing...I think I will stop right here.

Chapter 7

Halling looked at Teyla with understanding and concern as she spoke of her son's inabilities to sleep at nights, giving her a knowing look. Remembering all too well the sleepless nights when he and his beloved Jara had spent with their son, Jinto when he was a baby. His son who was now on the verge of entering adulthood in the coming months, whose body was unscarred by their months of captivity, but whose mind was just now beginning to heal from what he had witnessed and they had endure at the hands of Michael and his men. Jinto still had the bad dreams, but not as frequently as when they had first arrived on the planet. Halling was however grateful that the focus of Michael's experiments seem to centered on the men more so the women and children. That focus did however center on the men and women known to have similar gifts like Teyla.

Halling's eyes quickly locked onto Teyla assessing her for a moment. He could see the darken circles under her eyes upon closer inspection of her face. He also noticed something as well. The fire of Teyla's spirit that was always present in her eyes was a little bit dimmer now. Her jovial spirit seem tapered and in its place a kind of somber. He knew she carried many concerns, concerns for her son, concerns for him and the rest her people.

Concerns that the threat to her and her son, Torren from Michael was still real, it was well known in the encampment that Michael was able to escape from Colonel Sheppard and his people and that he was still out there, fixated on Teyla and Torren. It was that fear that permeated the encampment, the fear that their lives were still in danger especially, the lives of Teyla and her son. That none of them were truly safe from this Michael until he was found and dealt with.

He had wondered these many months after his and his people's captivity at how Michael and his men were able to find their village on their former home world. Under the cover of darkness, Michael and his men appeared suddenly, attacking their village, beams of lights cutting across the village capturing them from the Darts that streaked across the night sky. Then being held at Michael's compound while he did his experiments on them. The days and the nights became the same, but it was in those times he began to wondered how this evil and cruelty had befall him and his people. Did one of their trading partners betray them?

Since, it was known by his people that many in the Pegasus Galaxy did not like some of the actions of the people of Atlantis, because those actions had resulted in the destruction of several worlds, by the Wraith and Replicators, and even Michael. Or the power it seems they wielded in the galaxy. And since it was no secret to many in the Pegasus Galaxy of the Athosians and their leader connection to the people of Atlantis, with that realization in mind, the Athosians' village location was kept closely guarded.

He hoped to one day find the truth to this question. But for now, he had faith that Teyla's friends from the city of the Ancients would protect her and her son and this encampment if the need arise in the future. It seems that Teyla's faith and belief in Colonel Sheppard and his people had also grown a root in him too. Although, it took him a lot longer in accepting the ways of these people who lived in the city of the ancients – where from the beginning Teyla had felt that these people would one day will be able to defeat the Wraith, believing so strongly that she joined the Colonel's team and stayed on Atlantis when it became eventually uncomfortable for him and the rest of their people to stay on Atlantis when their people were faced with mistrust and accusations of collaborating with Wraith.

There were some of their people who did question the wisdom of her decision to stay especially since she and her people had been put under a cloud of suspicion when they had resided in the city of the ancients which had _facilitated_ their departure from the city. But, it was that decision that showed Teyla strength of conviction. She would do what she thinks is right even if it meant going against her own people's wishes. It was thought by some of elder of their people that she would eventually be seduce with the life she led living in the city of the Ancients and that she would not returned to her people when hearing the tales of her many adventure with these strangers from a different galaxy. But Teyla had always returned home. And her association with these people who was once their accusers had become beneficial to the Athosian's people and to Colonel Sheppard's people, with their past discord muted.

Halling also knew Teyla would never complain or asked for any assistance, preferring to shoulder those burdens on her own, never allowing her self to express weakness. Knowing she carried the guilt for what done to him and the others from their earlier such talks. Thinking that maybe he could provide some assistance to Teyla. His strength was returning. His body had gain back some of the muscle mass it had lost during those months of his captivity. He was feeling his old self again, for the first time, in a long time.

"You know, Teyla, I think many of us here have regained some of our former selves. I think we can make this encampment a home for our families. We can plant the seeds for the crops for the coming harvest. The climate on this planet does seem to be in our favor. I know our numbers have been reduced, but we are a strong and proud people. Our ancestors have been displaced before."

Both thought about the cullings by the Wraith that their ancestors had suffered through for hundreds of centuries, but neither voiced it. There was no need to. These cullings were documented and scribed on the walls in the cave back on their old home world. Their history as a people was told through those markings on those walls.

It was expected when a young Athosian's male or female was about to entered adulthood; it was a right of passage that _that _young boy or girl was required to spend a day in the cave to learn the history of their people. And from that day forward, to continue with preserving that history and updating it with each new event the Athosians as a people would face. So the survivors of a culling would document that culling, the lives lost as a result of the culling any other information they deem relevant. They did this for their heritage and history. This was also useful in tracking the bloodlines and families of their people.

"And they have always found a way to move forward and this time is no different even if the circumstances that brought us here are somewhat different."

Halling watched the varying of emotions that his words brought to Teyla's face and eyes. He saw the tears that were gathering in the corners of her eyes, threatening to spill their banks, staining her face. Teyla walked over to Halling, moment later the foreheads of the two life long friends touch together.

----

"Thank you my old friend you have given me reason to smile today."

Halling nodded – he was happy to see the light of spirit in Teyla returning somewhat. It would do him to good to use his hands again, to build, and to create. A sense of purpose renewed in him.

"And now, I must to go and check on my son." Teyla provided, feeling a happiness that has long eluded her these past many weeks even with the birth of her son.

"Teyla, I look forward to spending some time with that young son of yours."

"I would love that Halling."

"So will I. It will be most interesting to see which of his parents that he takes after."

"Well, I hope he has the best of both of his parents. Now, question is where is that son of mines? I left him in the company of his father, Ronon and Carson when I came to check on…ah…when I came to visit you old friend."

"I know what you came to do." Halling giving Teyla a knowing look, he knew Teyla had been very corncer for him.

"I am almost back to being myself as you can see. (He smiled proudly.) Come I will walk with you to get your son."

As Halling and Teyla left the tent and began their walking toward the tent that was used as the medical lab in the encampment.

"And how are things between you and Kanaan?"

"As well as can be expected I suppose. He wants to be a part of his son's life."

"And you want this as well?"

"I want my son to know his father. I can not deny either of them that right. "

"So does this mean you intend for you, Kanaan, Torren to be a family together?"

"Sometimes, it is not a matter of what I want, but what must be my friend."

TBC

_Thanks for reading. Please leave a review._


	8. Chapter 8

I want to thank guys for your reviews. I know it has been awhile since I have updated this story, but RL dealt my family a loss which we will continue to miss for years to come. I am not going to talk about the depressing details. Let's just say that my appreciation for my family and friends and the things that are important to me have tenfold. A couple of my friends have encouraged me to continue writing. I do enjoy writing. It is time I don't have to do it which frustrates me.

So this chapter I wanted to get inside Teyla's head a little. How she review certain characters and issues. And to finally have Teyla and John in the same room to have a discussion.

Chapter 8

"Are you sure?"

"Jennifer, thank you. I really appreciate you looking after him," Teyla provided as she traded smiling glances with Dr. Jennifer Keller as she handed her son over to the waiting doctor's arms.

"Teyla, it is my pleasure. He is such a cute little guy," Jennifer cooed looking down at the baby in her arms. Teyla looked lovingly at her son who was gurgling at the moment and then at Jennifer and smiled.

"I really want thank you again for doing this. It has truly been a really hectic time." For a moment, the smile left Teyla's face.

"No problem."

Dr. Keller's attention was a little more focused on the baby in her arms and less on the baby's mother who was preparing to walk out of her quarters. She was too busy lavishing her attention on the infant she was securing in her arms. And Teyla's son, Torren seems to be just as curious about the woman who was now holding him.

"I will not be long. I should be back in a couple hours."

Dr. Keller looked up at Teyla, seeing the hesitation from the young Athosian's mother.

"It is not a problem Teyla, take all the time you need. I think me and the little guy here will be just fine for a few hours. "

With that Teyla, looked at Dr. Keller still with some uncertainty for a moment, and then at her son whom seems to be quite contented and smiled.

---

Over an hour later, Teyla was in her quarters, flames from the lighted candles surrounding her bed illuminating her room.

Teyla was sitting atop of her bed trying to meditate. She was trying to find peace in her meditation where her day to day waking hours lately didn't afford her that serenity. It was a rarity especially with her dealing with the stress of being a new mom, trying to be a leader to the remaining of people, the new changes to the command structure on Atlantis with Mr. Woolsey taking Colonel Carter place, and how the new changes in her life had also affected her relationships with her teammates, John especially. And she was also dealing with her concerns on whether she should return to work and her concerns about keeping her son safe from Michael.

Even though, she was a little more hopeful now since her recent visit to see her people. Halling had looked well as well as some of the others. Her people had seemed to be on their way to recovery and she was excited about that prospect even though she knew that the threat to herself, her son and her people from Michael was still very much real. It was a fear she didn't voice.

So her happiness of her people's improvement was tapered by her thoughts that Michael was still out there somewhere, planning to take away her son, to use her son for his sick plans. She knew she would die before she allowed Michael to take or harm her son. There was no doubt that Michael would be back, the question is when. Teyla felt her body tense, the tension in her body seems to increase with each passing thoughts of Michael. The compassion she had once felt for Michael's plight, when he was first made human was no longer presence in her heart or her mind, rage and hatred now pulsated through her veins. She wanted Michael to pay for what he did to her people and what he tried to do her and her son.

Deciding her thoughts of Michael were having the wrong desired affect on her emotions Teyla tried to clear her mind. But it was a mind clouded by thoughts. Thoughts of her son, her family, her mother and father in particular who she never stop missing with each pasting day, her people, her teammates, Kanaan.

Teyla knew she had much to think about and a few things to decide for one her doubts about returning to John's team. The very concerns she had while pregnant about returning work after giving birth to her son where ever more stronger with the birth of her son. She loved her team mates. And she considered them her family. Prior to being pregnant with her son, Torren, she would have gladly died for anyone of them. Now, she has to think about her son's future now no matter how much she loved being on John's team. She still had the belief that John and his people were the truly real hope of defeating the Wraith or drastically reducing the threat of Wraith for the people of the Pegasus Galaxy.

At the time, she had believed that was the driving force that made her joined John's team. Now, looking back, she realized that there were other things too. Those things were still just as important, but sometimes the path we wish to follow get change by unexpected events. Her recent pregnancy and subsequent birth of her son had demanded that. So no matter how important she feels the work on John's team is, her son has to be her first priority.

It was not like she hadn't been dealing with changes already. Everyone on Atlantis included her teammates had treated her differently upon learning of her pregnancy. John had taken her off active duty once he had learned of her pregnancy. It was a decision she had fought in the beginning, but had come to accept the wisdom of his decision. Now, since having Torren, her relationships with her teammates had undergone even more changes since her pregnancy.

She had notice that Rodney was trying to be more personable which so, was unlike Rodney that she couldn't help but find it endearing. To many on Atlantis, Rodney behavior at times was considered borderline obnoxious and rude. His intelligent had somehow precluded him from showing any humility to his fellow scientists and sometimes to his very own teammates.

And it was well known by his teammates about his aversion to having kids around him. On that planet that they had visited several years back that was only inhabited children on her first year on Atlantis, Rodney was very vocal about that particular feeling. In spite of that two of the youngsters took a liking to him or maybe it was the chocolate candy bars he had gave to them. She along with the rest of his teammates had taken great delight in teasing Rodney about that for weeks after.

So she had thought it was quite sweet that Rodney had made an effort to spent time with Torren. Rodney was so nervous on his first visit he almost dropped Torren when she was placing Torren into his outstretched arms. That moment was both frightening and funny at the same time. Frightening for what almost happened to her son and funny for the look of horror that befell on Rodney's face. Although, at the time, she did not find it quite as amusing as she does now.

Then Ronon, Teyla's thoughts of Ronon brought a curvature to her lips. Because of his huge statute and quiet fierce nature, most of the personnel on Atlantis from the scientists to the marines thought of Ronon as someone to fear, they looked upon Ronon has a strong imperious, skilled fighter, a warrior. Yes indeed, Ronon was all those things to her as well, but she was also privileged to see his soft, vulnerable and funny sides too. She thought of Ronon as a sibling. And she believed Ronon felt the same way too about her. They shared similar histories having grown up in the Pegasus Galaxy so they could relate to things that the others on Atlantis may not. So it was with great delight that she enjoyed watching the huge statuesque man with her son in his arms.

Of her teammates, John's behavior was the most disconcerting and hurtful. It was not lost on her that John hadn't made any real attempts to spent any time with Torren as her other two teammates had. She had believed hers and John's relationship had a deeper understanding once they had gotten past his initial anger when he first learned that she had kept her pregnancy from him.

In fact, John was with her when she first felt her son moved inside her womb for the first time. She was so excited by the awe of it all. She couldn't wait to share it with him. She had taken John's hand, guiding it to the part of her stomach that she felt the baby kicking. Feeling the warmth of his skin, his touch, as her hands covered his hand that was touching her stomach at the moment, the happiness of that moment, suddenly dispel by the realization in her mind and in her heart.

Suddenly, sensing she wasn't alone, Teyla opened her eyes. Weary trouble amber eyes made contact with guarded green eyes, green eyes surrounded with a gold hue around their irises.

----

John stood inside the doorway to Teyla's quarters. He was watching Teyla who was sitting on her bed her limbs contorted, his eyes fixing on her face for moment, then dropping to the slow rise and fall of her chest, as Teyla breathed in and out. John felt a rush of heat came over him. Teyla didn't realize he was there. John saw her eyes opened suddenly, giving him the feeling as if he had intruded on her privacy, which wasn't his intent.

"Hey."

"John."

"Can I come in?"

"Come in."

Teyla gestured to a seat besides her bed. John walked over and sat down, sitting on the edge of the seat. There was a long, awkward pause.

"Ah, so how was your visit with Halling and your people?"

"It went well. I see so much progress with them. Carson has been truly a gift from the ancestors. And John, I'm truly grateful for all the help you and your people have provided to my people."

John could hear the excitement in Teyla's voice.

"It was nothing. It was the least we could do. Good, good, ah, Teyla, I need to talk you about something."

**"**Of course. Is everything alright?"

"Sure."

John looked around the dimly lit room for a moment, feeling a bit nervous.

"Ah, so where is Torren?"

"He is with Jennifer. She offered to keep him awhile so I could do my meditation."

"So, I am interrupting you then?"

"No, it is fine John. Are you sure everything fine?"

"Ah…"

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Thank you guys for your reviews and comments. Now this is the second draft of this chapter. The first draft, I had envisioned the conversation between John and Teyla to be much more heated maybe in tune to the television show. But as I was revising that draft, I felt that I should give these two characters a conversation that I would have like to have seen them have in some form.

See I always saw John and Teyla as close friends too besides possible love interest. We have seen them have major talks. It has been implied that they talk by the writers. So when I saw how this particular issue was addressed in the show. I was like WTH! No, I wasn't too happy. I know I have said this before, but it bears repeating the writing efforts and the character development by the writers in general and especially for the last season for Teyla, Ronon, and even John was unbelievable lacking IMHO. Gosh, I love Rodney, but I didn't want to watch a show all about Rodney and only Rodney's love interest and love life. I couldn't believe the direction the ptb took the show. They stole my joy.

Anyway, this chapter is about exploring and believing in that friendship that existed between John and Teyla.

**Chapter 9**

"No, it is fine John. Are you sure everything fine?"

"Ah…"

John looked up at Teyla for a moment. Teyla had gotten off of the bed and now was standing in front of him, looking down at him as he sat in the chair. The air around them filled with anticipated tension.

"Ah, Woolsey mentioned that you haven't given him your papers to return to the team yet."

Teyla looked at John hesitantly. The decisions that her mind was telling her that she needed to make, her heart wasn't willing to give in yet.

"I know."

Turning away from the prying eyes of John, Teyla tried to gather her thoughts. Already knowing, the words she was going to say will be upsetting to John. Teyla's eyes focused on John once more.

"Why? Is everything okay?"

"John, this has not been the easiest time for me," Teyla began.

"I know that."

"I, I have much to consider. I have my son. Then... there are my people. And right now, I am needed by both of them. "

"Teyla, I get that. I know how important your son and your people are to you. And that they need you now."

"John, I know you would understand. So I am hoping you would understand what I am about to say to you. What I'm trying to tell you is that that I can't return to the team now."

"Yeah I figure as much. You need more time. So how much time do you think you need before you think you are able to come back?"

"I, I don't know. And it is not that simple John."

John's brows furrowed. He was starting to get that sinking feeling in his gut.

"Ah okay..., what do you mean it is not that simple?"

"What I am trying to tell you is that I don't know when or if I will ever be able to return to the team."

John jumped up and out of his seat, shortening the distance between himself and Teyla, now looking down frustratingly at her.

"What! Teyla, are you saying there is a possibility that you might not be returning to the team ever?"

Teyla sighed. She could feel the tension rising from John. She knew they need to talk, but she wasn't planning on doing it tonight. She knew John wouldn't be too happy with her decision. But, she had hoped he would understand it. Her face now was expressing the turmoil of her emotions.

"Yes. John, I, I'm sorry."

"I knew it. Something told me you would... I just knew. Damn it Teyla."

John looked away from Teyla, running his hand through hair. It was not like he hadn't thought of that possibility. Especially since Teyla had hinted of her concerns about returning to work after the birth of her son before. Although at the time, her people were still missing. And he had tried to reassure her, the best he could. From that moment, that possibility never left him. It was that possibility that made him dread having this conversation with her tonight to begin with. And now the possibility of him losing Teyla as a teammate had become real, more real that he ever wanted it to be. It was a possibility he didn't want to live with.

"John, it is complicated. And right now there are only a few things that I am certain of. And that is that I have to put the needs of my son and my people above everything else. "

"The needs of your son and people" John repeated, as he felt his grip on his guarded emotions slipping. Which emotions, he wasn't too sure, his pulse was racing, his heart was beating rapidly, he wanted to scream, and then there was that sudden need to hit something, anything.

"I have been giving this some thought for some time now. And this is not a really easy decision for me especially since I truly believe your people is this galaxy only real hope of living in a world , without fear from the Wraith. But, I am a mother now. And my people need their leader."

"So, take the time. It's not like nobody wouldn't understand."

John saw the half smile and half frown his words brought to Teyla's face. And he saw in her eyes, her doubts and uncertainty that his words weren't able to assail.

"It is not just that. You don't think that I don't want to be out there fighting along side with you, Rodney and Ronon? I want to protect my son, I want to protect my people and the people of this galaxy. I want to be able to protect my son from Michael. I know he is still out there. And that thought frightens me more than you know."

"And you can do that here, on the team."

"But it is not that simple. How can I be effective, if I am guided by fear rather than my instinct? To wonder if and when we have to go on a mission, will this be the day I leave my son without a mother. John, there are no guarantees that anyone of us will return from any mission. To be burden with concerns like... how can I leave my son without a mother? How can I go on a mission not secure in the knowledge whether I would be willing to die for any one of my team mates if the need calls? I knew that answer before. Before, I would have without hesitation. Now, I am not certain."

John stared momentarily at Teyla. To him, he has never met a woman or that many men, including most of the men who were under his command more fearless than the woman who face was just inches from his own now. But Teyla was struggling right now with the changes in her life. Teyla was being Teyla. Her compassion, her sense of right and wrong were always miles above his. She had long become his moral compass since their time together as friends and teammates. She had never shied away from telling him if she felt his judgment was morally questioned. That is one of thing, he had most liked and respected about her. Teyla would do what she thinks is right for everyone. Well, he had to tell her and make her believe that staying on the team was where she could do the most good.

"I remembered you had those same concerns before while you were pregnant. I told you then that your son had a family here on Atlantis. He is one of us! The things you say you believe in and want to do can be accomplished here on Atlantis and on the team. I say we can take the fight to Michael. And, as for you watching my back on a mission, I trust you with my life Teyla and I will always trust you with my life and I can only say that about a couple of people and you are one of them. And I have told you before I would rather die before I let anything happen to you, ah… to any one of you."

"John, I..."

"No, Teyla. You do believe me right?"

"John of course I do. But..."

"Then it's settled. I don't want to hear any more of you leaving the team. We can work this out…"

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

Guys, I know it had been awhile since I have updated this story. I have worked on a few chapters the last several months hoping to finish the story before I post it. No, it is not quite done. And this chapter was actually longer, but I decided to make it into like three chapters I think it will read better. So some chapters will be short and others will be longer. So my posting of more chapters should be more frequent.

So please leave a review.

Chapter 10

John and Teyla had talked and came to a solution of sort. Teyla was taking a leave of absence. She would be leaving Atlantis for several weeks to visit with her people. But one of the most important questions, her return to John's team was still a question that was still left unresolved. It was a question that Teyla hoped to find the answer to with this time away with her people. John knew he wanted to give Teyla the time she needed to make that decision. Yet, a certain fear existed for him. What if Teyla didn't want to come back to Atlantis or to the team?

***

"So Colonel Sheppard, you are telling me that Ms. Emmagen will not be rejoining your team for the foreseeable future."

"Yes that is what I'm saying Mr. Woosley." John answered Mr. Richard Woolsey. John's face was devoid of any outwardly emotions masking his conflicting thoughts and emotions.

Mr. Woolsey continued talking. "And that she has decided to take a leave of absence." John nodded his head in response. "That she has decided to leave Atlantis?"

"Yes Mr. Woolsey. That's her decision." John replied, hugging his arms around his chest as he sat back into the seat to look at Mr. Woolsey, his lips creasing. He wasn't too happy with Teyla's decisions for a number of reasons even if he did understood her reasons for wanting to do this. And some of the reasons for his only unhappiness he didn't want to delve into. He knew that he certainly didn't want Teyla to leave Atlantis. Maybe, he was being selfish. But he didn't want her to go. And right now, that no matter how well he thought he knew Teyla her decision to stay on his team or to come back to Atlantis was a mystery to him.

"How unfortunate." Mr. Woolsey responded, looking down at the papers in front him before looking up at John once more. "And how long will her leave of absence be Colonel?"

"I'm not really sure. She has requested several weeks and I'm willing to give her that. She wants to be there for her people. Teyla's time with her people will be decided by Teyla. Teyla isn't part of our military or technically this expedition she doesn't have to follow our rules."

"I see. So does this mean that you will find a replacement for her on your team?"

"Yes. But it will only be a temporary replacement." John heard himself saying. Whether, he believed what he was saying was another matter. Right now, he didn't have any clue if and when Teyla would be back. And that thought scared him more than he wanted to acknowledge.

"I can assign one of my marines for the time being. Mr. Woolsey, I want to make this clear I consider Teyla as an invaluable member of my team, her knowledge and contacts through out this galaxy makes her an asset not only to my team, but to this city. Her skills are unquestioned. She has the respect of just about every person, man here, marine or otherwise, she can probably kick most of their butts too. Right now, I am willing to give her the time she needs for her people and her son. I don't see a problem here. Do you?"

Mr. Woolsey's mouth twisted in almost into a frown, as if he was thinking about something while he looked at John pointedly. "Okay Colonel we will play it your way for now."

"Alright, thank you sir. Ah, are we done here?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Good." John got up from his seat to leave Mr. Woolsey's office.

Mr. Woolsey watched Colonel Sheppard as he was leaving his office. For Woolsey, he had always consider himself as a by the book man, he had embrace the rules and regulations, they were there for a reason, yet somehow since the short time he had come to Atlantis and as taken over as the new head of Atlantis, the rule book he had hope to follow had somehow been toss out the proverbial window a few times already. He knew there would be several at the IOA who wouldn't be fond of Ms. Emmagen's decision to leave Atlantis. Ms. Emmagen was leaving Atlantis with knowledge of Atlantis and of Earth. She would be considered a security risk. Mr. Woolsey sighed.

***

Shortly thereafter John found himself outside of Teyla's quarters.

Teyla heard the beeping of the door to her quarters. She had finally just put Torren down for the night. She didn't want the noise to disturb Torren She quickly went to the door, passing her hand over the wall panel, the door opening, to reveal John standing there.

"Can I come in?"

Teyla moved aside to allow John entrance into her quarters. She raised her hand to her lips. "I just put Torren to sleep." She advised John.

"Oh…." John lowering the tone of his voice, "Just wanted you to know I spoke with Mr. Woolsey and told him of your decision to leave Atlantis."

"John, I…"

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

I was working on this story last year when RL got a little too hectic along with some major family drama. I've read a couple of things recently that reminded of my goals regarding all of my WIPs I had made at the beginning of this year and that I usually keep telling myself any way, and then there have been a few nudges for me to finish the story, you know who you are. Thanks for the nudges.

**Chapter 11**

The Athosian's encampment was full of activity. There was a chorus, a multitude of sounds filling the brisk morning air. Men and women gathered in various small groups talking, working, each with their assign purpose, a group of pre-adolescent children playing in the fields of green and rustic grass and ferns, jovial and boisterous in their game of tag. Teyla watched from a distance, a smile warming her face. She was very pleased to see the positive changes in the camp. The camp had undergone many changes during the past several weeks since she had began to spend most of her time here on the planet with her people.

The planet was quickly being transformed into a new homeworld for her people. Gone were their homeworlds of old. Her people had begun to build anew. And it seemed they were taking to the new task of building a new community with aplomb, with the work they had begun in the fields; the structures housing individual families. A feeling of contentment came over Teyla.

Her people had survived Wraith's cullings for generations to then be abducted by Michael and his hybrids for Michael's sick plans, plans that were just seeing the light of discovery. She felt a deep sense of responsibility for what had befallen upon her people because of this. It was a guilt she carried alone because it was there in her heart, in her mind, her fear that it was because of her and her association with Atlantis, that Michael had targeted her people. So she was determined that they would survive the evils of Michael's experiments.

She had to believe that her people would rise about this latest obstacle. They had done it before and they seem to be doing it now. And as their leader she needed to be here although for the past few years while she had lived of Atlantis, Halling had been the leader that she could not be to her people. And when Halling was once again strong in the body and was able to be the leader he once was - she would gladly give him that right back because he had earned it, should her people wish it so.

Today, she was feeling a great deal of pride and joy for her people's resilience spirit. Her people had lost so much these last five years along with centuries of cullings by the Wraith. As with her own family, there was no one in the camp who hadn't been affected by the Wraith's cullings of the past. And her people's recent encounter with Michael had once again destroyed or severely affected many families. But, to her people, family had long cease to be about blood ties. Family had become about acceptance and providing for each other throughout their history as a people. She herself had been a child of such circumstances.

She had been raised by Charin, a close family friend of her parents after experiencing the loss of her beloved father as a young adolescent during a culling by the Wraith. Her mother had been long absence, taken in a previous cullings years before. Charin had taken her in for she was the last of the Emmagen linage that remained on Atho. Charin became her family, her grandmother and all that remained of what she considered her family until her passing. Losing Charin, four years ago had been difficult, especially with the knowledge that Charin could have prolonged her time, to be with her and their people.

But Charin had chosen her destiny, a choice that many in the Pegasus rarely got to make. So she could never begrudged Charin for her choice to not take the treatment that Carson had thought that could help her. And even though the pain of losing Charin had dimmed through the passage of time, there were still days she missed Charin's presence in her life. The pain of that loss was so much like the loss she still felt for her parents.

She had been wondering a lot lately whether these losses were the fuel of her determination to give Torren, the family she felt her son needed above everything. For that that had been snatched away from her at such a young age. All those months thinking Kanaan was dead that her son would never know his father had burdened her heart. It was a loss she had endured in silence for the most part. Sadden that he would never know the life they had created when he was lost along with the rest of their people.

Although hers and Kanaan's relationship had only recently moved beyond their years of friendship, she had begun to care deeply for Kanaan. He had been such an important friend in her life for many years since childhood. Someone she could relate to and openly share their gifts. And the months before his disappearance, Kanaan had been such a soothing and comforting force to her when the loss of her friends had her grieving and that widening disconnect she was feeling from her own people. It was then she saw Kanaan as more. The belief of the man Kanaan could be to her and their people. Now that belief has faded and she was uncertain as to what to do now.

But today, she would not let her own personal struggles dampen her joy for her people. Her people's health and wellbeing had much improved. She was very pleased to see Kanaan and the others growing stronger every day, looking more and more like their former selves and not one of Michael's half human hybrid creatures. Caron's retro virus had seemed to cured Kanaan and the others who had been suffering from various ailments caused by Michael's experiments.

So she had lots to be thankful about for this planet did have many things to offer her people. The weather was suitable in fact it was a lot like the weather of Atho their former planet, bright sunlight in the waking hours, with brief interruptions of rain, nights of slight cooling. The landscape of the planet was full of greenish lush vegetation, streams of water, and a terrain full of greenwood of all shapes and sizes. Her people had already begun planting some crops. Most of men had been out in the fields since the early morning farming the crops.

Their crops choices were limited, that why there had been recent discussions of them trading again with some of their old trading partners. Even with the somewhat limitations of the crops, she and her people were hopeful for a fruitful harvest with the little crops they had. Her talk with Halling last night had resulted in her need to return to Atlantis in the next few days to discuss what supplies they may be in need of. She was hoping to broker trades with some of their old trading partners that were both beneficial to her people as well as for those on Atlantis.

Teyla began to walk the path to the medical tent carrying Torren. There were still issues in her own life to she was still trying to find the answers to. But for now they could wait.

Teyla stood outside of the tent's entrance. "Carson?"

"Teyla dear, please come in."

Teyla pulled back the flap of the tent as she entered. The tent had been designated as a medical triage/infirmary and Carson's base of operation. Although, Carson had been called back to Atlantis a couple weeks ago, he had promised he would return at this time. The Athosians were able to take care of their own. For Carson had trained a couple of the young girls in basic first aid. So the ongoing care of the ailing Athosians could continue with his absence. The tent also housed a few medical supplies provide by Atlantis as well as some Athosian's herbal remedies, and some basic medical equipments and some small cots for the sick and injuries.

"Carson, it is good to see you." Teyla smiled brightly at Carson. It really was good to see him. She missed her teammates and her friends on Atlantis. She hadn't realized how much she had considered Atlantis to be her home until these past several weeks living among her people.

Carson had been watching as Teyla entered the tent with a baby sling across her chest. Carson smiled at Teyla as well.

"It's good to see you too lass." Carson peeked down to look into the sling. "I see you brought the wee little one with you too."

"I think he is due for his checkup. (Teyla looked smilingly down at Torren in the sling.) And besides, my son seems to get very fussy when he away from his mother for very long. He's even fussy with Kanaan sometimes, so I really don't like to leave him with anyone for too long while he is still so young."

"Really." Carson said curiously as he motioned for Teyla to have a seat.

Meanwhile, in another part of the camp, in the fields, Kanaan allowed the soil to slowly fall from his hands, looking up from the ground, his eyes scanned his surroundings, his eyes catching sight of Halling with a young Athosian male. The young man's name was Tao. The two men were standing on the end of the perimeter of one of the fields. The two men seem to be having a deep discussion about the fields. Kanaan observed the two men for a moment. A smirk curved the corner of his lips.

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

The chapters that I had originally planned to post after the last chapter I decided to change a few things, so I've been rewriting when I can then last night I lost some of those rewrites. *face palm* Gosh, I should be in bed because I so need to get a decent night sleep. Things will be getting interesting since Teyla will be back on Atlantis in the next chapter.

**Chapter 12**

Atlantis… John exited out of his bathroom, with a large white towel tied around his waist, and a the small hand towel in his hand rubbing through his recent wash wet hair. Walking over to his window, he looked down at dark water below and the city. His quarters didn't exactly give him a panoramic view of the city, but he still could see a good part of it from this view. Darkness had descended on the city, so he could the area of the city now aglow with lights of colors.

John could feel the coolness of the night air as it brushed his face and his bare chest as he stood at window, but that wouldn't deter him from enjoying the view. Many times he had found himself doing the same thing on the outside balcony of the control tower, wearing more clothes of course. The city at night was illuminating. He knew it was a passion he didn't share alone.

John finally turned away from the window, not sure how he had stood there watching the city. He laid the small towel that was still in his hand across the back of the chair that stood near the stand by his window. He walked over to his bed reaching for the black T-shirt that lay across it. He started to get dress, but it wasn't as if he had planned to go anywhere tonight. He pulled the T-shirt over his head, pulling it down over his bare chest. He then grabbed the pair of his black sweats he had laid out on his bed too, stepping in the pair of sweats one leg at a time, then pulling them upward over his lean hips, then tightening the drawstrings in front.

He felt clean and more refresh after his shower. He had been so happy to take a shower to wash off the dirty and the drying mud that seem to had covered his entire lower body and most of his upper body too. He and the rest team had just returned from planet MLP42 within the last couple hours. As mission went, this one was rather uneventful even with Rodney excessive complaining about the conditions aside.

He was just glad that they only had to battle more the elements of mother nature than an ambush from an unforeseen enemies such as the Wraith or Michael's hybrids or whatever they were being call these days; they were still creepy looking to him. But it wasn't as if he had enjoyed, wadding through laurustinus that were taller than him either, in the pouring rain, and a terrain mudded by the torrential down pour that seemed to come out of nowhere. The footing had become treacherous in the higher elevation as they made their way back down the hilly areas of the woods that it was miracle they got out of there in one piece to the Stargate. His team had left the planet mostly unscaved. So he was grateful for that. There had only been one minor casualty.

Major Bolton, who he had finally picked to replace Teyla on his team, temporarily, had suffered a broken leg when the loose wet soil gave way from under him causing him to tumble several feet down the hill. They had been fortunate that was the only casualty considering how bad the conditions had become. So this was a casualty he could live with. Major Bolton would be fine in a few weeks per the doc's assessment, but his team would be a man down. He hadn't been in a hurry the first time to find a replacement for Teyla. And that hadn't change.

It had taken him a few of days to find someone he thought would be a good suitable replacement for Teyla on the team. He had finally gave into Mr. Woolsey continuing pressure. So he finally decided to select Major Steven Bolton. Major Bolton was a good enough solider in his opinion. The young man was strong and he was also intelligent, although he had limited service experience and this was his first tour of duty on Atlantis.

He found that he generally did like the young man who at times seemed to be a little out of his element when he had been in the company of Ronon and Rodney. Two different personalities if there ever was one. He had considered for a short time or at the very least had entertained the idea of putting Lt. Lorne on his team. He respected the Lt. greatly. But he had nixed that idea pretty early because the Lt. Lorne was his second and had his own team.

Both Rodney and Ronon had seemed to take the changes in stride for the most part keeping their thoughts and opinions to themselves when it came to Teyla's absence or the newest member of their team which suited him fine because he really didn't care discuss it with anyone.

John gave himself a mental note to check on the Major's progress tomorrow before he sat down to work on his mission report about the mission after his briefing meeting with Mr. Woolsey.

John looked around his room. He was kind of feeling a little bit tired too. For it had truly been a long day. His eyes finally paused to rest on his bed. His bed should be a welcome sight considering how tired he was starting to feel. John continued to look at his bed for moment, frowning. For he knew his bed wouldn't exact bring him any solace. Neither would sleep or his dreams bring him any real peace of mind.

So although right now he wanted to gladly fall into his bed and get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. The problem with that was that he found that sleep didn't come easy to him most nights, especially since arriving on Atlantis. After he had awoke the Wraith on their first mission in the Pegasus then having to live with the fear that they could be attacks by their enemies who numbers seemed to have grown a bit lately. Him being able to sleep soundly was rarely an option to him; his guard was always constantly up, having to be ready at a moment notice.

But the last couple of the months had been the worst by far. Vivid nightmares had taken resident in his dreams lately along with the same old demons, there were new nightmares involving Teyla and now Torren. And he couldn't shake those feeling in his waking hours either.

Something didn't feel right to him. Apart from him questioning whether Teyla and Torren were truly safe living among the Athosian since Michael's whereabouts was still a mystery. He knew Michael still coveted Teyla and Torren, especially Torren for reasons that were still unclear to them. And in his heart, he felt that Teyla and Torren would be far safer here on Atlantis than on their new homeworld, considering Michael's knack of turning up at places, _uninvited_, where you least expected him to be. There's still too much they didn't know about Michael's operation.

And too many snagging questions. Questions he would like some answers to. Like how Michael knew of Teyla's pregnancy and her relationship with Kanaan when she had kept it from him and her friends. He supposed some of her people would knew of their relationship, but it was shock to the rest of them, certainly to him at any rate. He hadn't expected Teyla to be dating anyone.

He realized now that was his first mistake. Teyla was a beautiful woman. It had been probably foolish to think that she wouldn't find someone. He himself hadn't lived like a monk. There had women who'd shown him interest or had gotten his interest like Chaya. There had been more than one instance were he'd taken what they had offered him. He had made no promises of commitments because he had knew where his commitments lie. They had been and were to this expedition to Atlantis, to the people he considered his family now.

He thought he knew Teyla as well as anyone, but yet she had chose not tell him or anyone on Atlantis about Kanaan and yet somehow, Michael was aware of her relationship with Kanaan relationship then her pregnancy. Something was definitely off.

But of course, he had said nothing of his concerns to Teyla during their talk before she left the city. Maybe, he should have he thought now, but he didn't think it would have done much good if he had. He knew Teyla felt her responsibility to her people strongly and he had understood that all too well. And if he knew Teyla like he thought he did, Teyla was and still probably blaming herself for happened to her people. No matter if he or anyone had told her differently. Carrying guilt was something he knew all too well.

John sat down on the edge of his bed. Usually when he felt like this he would try to read a book until he fell asleep, but maybe a movie would distracted and relaxed him enough to get some sleep.

John reached for his laptop on the nightstand by his bed.

xxxx

Somewhere in the Pegasus…

The opening of a door cast a stream of light into the dimly lightly room, a shadow appear at the entrance. The eerily silence of the room, now suddenly interrupted by the footsteps of the figure that entered the room, the sound of the footsteps echoing throughout the room then suddenly stopping.


End file.
